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Workload is lightening
-leading to more time for me to draw
-leading to me being more together and approachable
-leading to my co-worker asking for proper fencing lessons
-leading to even MORE stress relief
-leading to growing a pair and asking an old friend to model for me
-leading to a decent set of days.
I know that i just jinxed it but sometimes you just have to acknowledge the good days and bask in
light....rare for the nocturnal, i know. :P
05/05/2007
What do you do when what you want ISN'T what you want? When your heart flutters and you feel a
little sick at the same time. Luckily for me, right now, I've got a LOT of things to focus on and keep
myself distracted. I've got a lesson plan to make, an image list to put together and a good number of
other little things.
05/08/2007
There are days where Karma plays at being Janus with a tic. Shining gold then dropping the floor out
from under you like in an Indiana Jones movie. So quick to swap her roles of peace to discord. The sky
shines while it falls straight for you :D
On days like this, I find its best to throw my thoughts out somewhere and leave them there. Go to bed
and see those thoughts again with waking eyes. Ok, I don't ACTUALLY leave anything anywhere but
its a nice idea, isn't it?
My Janus Karma with her peaceful discord and golden trap doors and falling clear skies. Karma, my
friend, my enemy, the only thing in this world I truly believe in.
05/12/2007
Wicked little thoughts cross my mind. Why oh why, I don't know why. Mind-games in many rooms
like a cruise ship on crack. People leaning out their doors and I see only me.
05/20/2007
The waves roll in. The tide pulls out. The waves roll in again and again. It carries the sands of castles
past and the memories of its last number of trips to the shore. There is no point in questioning it. Just
go with it and try not to be pulled out to sea with the undertows. The waves roll in and out with
random abide. No logic just music and art....
05/23/2007
What scares us more? The devil we know and have accepted as our next door neighbor who brings us
fresh lemonade every now and again or the great unknown (who I believe lives in Jersey somewhere).
Where do we draw the line between fear and biased anticipation? I'm starting to think the unknown
Jersey boy is looking mighty attractive compared to the devil i know. Maybe the devil you know
remembers to put a little sugar in his lemonade cuz it still tastes like swill.06/02/2007
Where does the time go? Just yesterday, I was thinking that. Wouldn't it be funny if I was losing time. I
have been forgetting a lot lately. A meeting here, a wedding there, a vacation along the way. Heck, the
closest thing to a vacation that I'm currently planning has inklings of work. Drawing/fun kinda work,
but work none-the-less. I'm kinda loving this weekend. Its the first time in a forever and a half that I've
just done ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Eh...
06/02/2007
Where does the time go? Just yesterday, I was thinking that. Wouldn't it be funny if I was losing time. I
have been forgetting a lot lately. A meeting here, a wedding there, a vacation along the way. Heck, the
closest thing to a vacation that I'm currently planning has inklings of work. Drawing/fun kinda work,
but work none-the-less. I'm kinda loving this weekend. Its the first time in a forever and a half that I've
just done ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. Eh...
06/04/2007
Another word of wisdom blown to motion blurs and wind effects. Already in my head, i've forgotten
what was meant, much less what was said. I think time is slowing down to accommodate me but the
brakes just don't work like they used to. Fingers run at a hundred keys a minute with nothing to say
since the mind's got a "Be Back In..." clock hanging in the window. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever.
The world sinks to stillness around me and I STILL don't feel like i'm catching up.
06/05/2007
I'm wrapped in the chains that are her. Like in the old mob days, I've been pushed over the pier and
am sinking. I go down faster than I can thinking about not breathing. Faster than I know how to pick
to locks. If this was a movie, I'd dislocate my shoulder and maneuver myself free. This isn't the movies,
though, is it? The big, looming question mark in my mind learned it was made of neon and found the
on-switch. As the taste of dirty salt water fills my mouth, I realize I should look towards the light and
appreciate it while I can still see...
...this always happens when I finally free my mind of my last shackles. I must truly be Catholic to the
bone. Hell, modern Catholic = psychological self-destruction with a smile!!!
06/07/2007
I am a soothsayer, visionary, seer. I have a prophecy that the next 3-5 weeks will be filled with restless
nights and quite likely some panic-induced fits of drinking (AMP). I also see a future of wanton
overtime and although the extra pay is nice, the sanity knows its about to take a long vacation.
06/12/2007
The clounds never look down to see who they're raining on. They just let it fall. The wind doesn't
count the number of leaves it blows into the air. It just blows. The fire doesn't distinguish good and
bad wood. It just burns.
Sometimes the sky falls while things blow and burn and there's nothing that can be done about it.
06/15/2007
Did somebody order an apocalypse? Its getting cold...
06/20/2007
This world spins round and round under my feet and somehow I failed to notice. Now that my
stomach's all topsy-turvy and I wanna get off, the guy who runs the ride has stepped away.
06/23/2007
Dreams. They can be our inspiration. They can be our friends. They can be our escape. With my stress
level and all that's been going on, i think that my subconscious finally decided to get back at me. A day
in my mind this morning was torture. I kept seeing some of the few things that make me sick to think
of. That drive me nuts.